5 Things I Wish I’d Done Differently For My Singapore Wedding
When I was planning my wedding, my friends all told me to relax. The day would go by in a blur, and even if anything went wrong, no one would notice or remember!
Well, it’s been a year and a half, and now that the "wedding high" is long over, here’s what I would reconsider if I could have a do-over:
1. Wearing a cathedral-length veil
My wedding gown was a bit on the simpler side, so when my bridal studio consultant suggested a cathedral-length veil, which would extend beyond the train of my gown, I immediately said yes. But in retrospect, hobbling around in a gown and heels is hard enough without having to deal with 300cm of tulle attached to your head. In between holding my bouquet, adjusting the front of my dress, and hooking the veil on my elbow, walking from photo location to photo location was way more effort than it had to be, especially when those locations involved stairs. Should you opt for a veil that was as OTT as mine was, make sure you appoint a bridesmaid as IC to keep it straight and to keep it off the ground when you need to use the toilet (ugh).
2. Attempting to DIY my welcome table
There are plenty of talented and resourceful DIY brides out there. I am not one of them. Saving things on Pinterest is one thing, but sourcing for all the various table items like glass bottles, letterboards, battery-operated candles, photo frames of various sizes, and wooden crates was not only tedious, it was expensive! Who knew that dried palm spears were $5 per stalk?!
After a couple of weeks of sourcing for props and meeting Carousell sellers all over the island, I caved and asked my florist if she could do welcome table décor. As it turns out, she already had most of the props that I would need, so adding a slight top-up for this service was not only more affordable, but it saved me from having to take home a bunch of barang-barang that I would never use again.
When you’re sourcing for vendors, consider asking your would-be florist if she offers prop rental. If she doesn’t, you can always find a separate vendor for decorations. Save yourself the bandwidth and the car trips - many will handle delivery, pickup, or even setup for props so that you can focus on all the other tasks that you can't outsource.
3. Springing for customised wedding signage
Wedding signs are so commonplace that I thought they were mandatory. How else would guests know they were entering the right place?
Well, that’s what receptionists are for, and I can promise you that guests will look at your wedding sign for a grand total of 2 seconds. I spent around $70 for a customised A2 acrylic wedding sign, thinking that my husband and I could repurpose it as décor once the big day is over, but I honestly couldn’t even tell you where it’s stored right now.
4. Not printing out my QR Code for PayNow
Some guests will either be too busy, or will forget, to bring cash for their red envelopes. Thank goodness for e-angbao right? Well, that's if those same guests - who are often a little frazzled due to being late, keeping track of their kids, or saying hello to friends - will remember to give you one after enjoying all the festivities. And in an age where RSVP-ing via Telegram handle is a thing, you'd be surprised at how many guests can't find your actual phone number. Printing out a PayLah/PayNow-compatible QR code for the welcome table would not only have saved my poor receptionists from having to answer "does the couple accept PayNow" about 50 times, but it would have made it more convenient for said guests to give their e-angbao on the spot.
5. Joining so many bridal Telegram groups
First I joined the "Brides to Be 2022" group. Then I joined the bridal group for the month I was getting married. Then I joined a group for my gown studio. Then I joined a group for my wedding venue. Then I joined a mini group for brides getting married on the same day as me. Sure, I gleaned a few helpful tips from these groups, but digging for them them amidst all the spam was, as they say, like finding a needle in a haystack.
If you need advice, ask a close friend, a vendor, or a member of your wedding party instead - they'll have more context about your financial situation, personal style, and vision, and will be able to give you more relevant advice than strangers on Telegram probably could.
6. Stressing out over wedding favours
At least a fourth of our wedding favours went unclaimed and ended up in the office pantry the following week. While preparing them is a nice gesture, they mostly go unremembered or untouched. If you're like me, you might feel a little paiseh not giving any out, but go ahead and ask yourself if you remember ever being offended that you attended a wedding without any. Then ask yourself how many wedding favours you've actually kept, used, or really enjoyed consuming. I can almost guarantee that you can count the number on less than one hand.
7. Spending so much money
Now that I'm in the midst of house renovations and preparing for my first child, I could really use a few thousand extra dollars in my bank account. While my husband and I saved a lot by opting out of physical wedding invites, not having bridesmaids or groomsmen, and forgoing videography, if I could go back in time, I'd just do a simple church wedding and forgo the banquet altogether, especially since our families were fine with us not having one. It's not like our guests would have minded either, since the novelty of attending wedding banquets wears off after you're in your mid-30s and have spent a decade giving ang pow.
At the end of the day, I had a blast at my wedding and none of these issues could really derail that. But if you're still planning yours, it's not too late to learn from my regrets. Best of luck with your big day!
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